i am sorry if i have failed you again and again. i am sorry if i have caused you pain again and again.
well, nothing is perfect in this world. i am neither perfect myself. i am just trying to love you with all i can. i am just trying not to be the him whom often ignores you.
we often state our disagreements, i often grumbles my unhappiness towards you but at the end of the day, in my heart, i still love you!
xia yu tian by nan quan ma ma.
how i wish i could be someone like that but i just couldn’t. i know i am not even though how hard i tried to. i know who i am. i might be putting up a strong front but yet i am still fragile on the inside. i am no longer being able to open up my heart to anyone. i am no longer being able to believe there’s true love. i am no longer able to think that love can be touched by doing the impossibles. no hearts can be touched if her heart doesn’t even belongs to you.
i have stopped believing. my friends wondered why and even myself i wondered why. why is that you are the one who’s angry at me and not me who is supposedly to be angry at you? why is that i beg you to be my friend even though you no longer want to be my friend? why is my heart longing for you even though yours doesn’t want to be mine?
i hate you but i hate myself even more. i am losing concentration nowadays. it seems that i have lost my fight. i fought for my survival under your encouragements. now, that i have lost you, it seems that i am no longer being able to see through everything.
what happens when something you live for leaves you?
if i knew i would lose a friend today, i would not have step into a relationship with her.
it all started in a beautiful month of february. my eyes just couldn’t look away from the sight of her. my heart felt something different, something warmth. as days passes by, we grew closer to each other. my heart grew fonder of her. that’s how everything begin. never would i know it would came to this ending where my heart was broken twice; one was she gave up the love we had, two was she even gave up the friendship we have.
yi ge ren jiu hao by liu li yang.
what is the happiness that you’ve been talking about? what is the happiness that everyone is talking about? what is your happiness? well, it can be the little things in life that makes life wonderful? or it could the be the grin of someone’s smile to lighten up your day? what ever the reason is, try to find a reason to smile everyday! because you’ll never know who’ll fell for it. cheers! start finding your happiness today.
recently, the teacher who inspired me about how important is education for life in my primary years came to talk to me. she posted a picture of me back when i was 12 years old. i looked kind of dumb with the “bowl” hairstyle. everyone is invited to have a good laugh because it’s posted on my facebook.
she was a great teacher and she still is. she inspired me about life and a lot of things. she was like a mentor to me. she told me to send her a card for my wedding. once again i confided in her and like she always do, advised me. she told me, “learn to accept, forgive and forget!” and that will be the phrase of the day. she told me about her past and only then i knew so many things happened in such a short period of 10 years time.
there are many things that are beyond our control and i really have to accept that fate somehow is not being solely controlled by yourself. there are higher powers above and they have certain plans for you. i shall entrust my faith to the higher powers above and let nature takes its course.
what is mine will be mine and what is not i shall not take.
anonymous friend by rainie.
yu ai by rainie.
i love this music!
in your eyes by rainie yang and show luo.
well, spoiled parts on an apple can be cut away but sweet memories are hard to be kept away. well, i guess my only weakness is that i am too faithful in love. even though the other half does not love me as much or does not even love me anymore but … some things are better left unspoken or unwritten. there are nothing much that i can say, there are nothing else i can do. no matter what, you will always be my friend! my dear friend, lovelle.
you’re my angel & declaration of love. i find both of these mvs very nice! enjoy.
you’re my angel by da mouth.
declaration of love by da mouth.
exams’ results will be released tomorrow morning at 10am. kind of anxious thinking about it. wonder what will it be? it rained over here. i wonder how’s everything over the other side? is everything well? i still remembered if ever i got an A, i will get a kiss. now it seems so far far away. promises made, wishes made are nothing but empty promises and fake wishes. words are just so unreal when you think back. keep telling myself i should move on but i still don’t know why i’m still clinging onto it.
sweet memories huh. indeed. when it rains, i always remember the first time we share an umbrella. i admit i am an idiot who don’t know how to share an umbrella. haha. well, everyone has their first time and then i improved over time. i still remembered you praised me for it.
whenever i see millennia tower, i’ll always think of the times i used to wait for you, bought you supper, brought you food, going for supper, wait for you in the middle of the cold rain. i miss those times. it happened a while ago but it seems so fresh in my mind.
i know you won’t be visiting my blog anymore. so, it’s alright for me to pen down all the sweet memories. don’t be mistaken that i’m not still over you. i just love the sweet memories we had.
well, i asked my friend and that’s what she told me which i think she’s completely right about everything.
-i guess that’s ur weakness
-ur always so over-like a girl
-if u konjw wat i mean
-but she doesnt even like u at that time
-u put all in and what do u get in return?>
-im just saying that…..
-u put in all ur love, heart, soul into a girl
-u didnt even give that person time to breath and digest and all
-and sometimes girl take it for granted
-since she konws u like her so much de
-but then all the things u did for her
-maybe she somehow fell for it
-but she didnt like u
-she just like the attention/ kindness that u showed
-that she tinks that it’s ok to give a try and see if things work out
-so basically she didnt be wiht u coz she likes u
-but more that she be with u coz she sympathize
-well, tat’s what i tink MAYBE lar
this part is what she thinks about guys. what really happened!
-as in
-i feel that sometimes GUYS lar
-coudl and could not be u
-i duno as i havent been knowing u for the past…5-6-7 years?
-well, as i was saying….
-sometimes guy just keep on showering the girl with love
-he’s sooooo in love with her
-keep on buggin her with “oh i like u and falling for u”
-this that this that
-all the “yok ma” stuff
-however, he doesnt konw that the girl doenst like him yet and treat him only as her fren
-so when he keeps on doing that to hre 24/7
-she hasnt have time to feel the love and all…
-then the guy already make a move
-when the guy make that move de
-the girl is not even sure how she feels
-but she feels sooo “FORCED” to try to be with him coz he did so much de
-i mean…girls need space and time also mar
-SPACE is important
-and dont always say u like her EVERYDAY
-it’s soo boring to hear that man!
-i konw L.O.V.E is about sharing love and etc etc
-but then telling and showing it all the time can make it turn sour
-unless the relationship is alreayd stable
-tat;s the weakness bout u I GUESS
this part is what shows that love doesn’t really need all those sweet little things you do but sufficient of care, concern and understanding is the most important part. this is what we called magic of love or “chemistry”! and i guess that’s what we’re lacking of.
-like me and my bf, tho we were so long together
-we’r stil so in love
-and we dont really need to do cards/ art work/ poems etc
-he neve really do anything for me
-but somehow we are soooo understanding of each other
conclusion, if you’re not meant to be, you’re not no matter how hard you tried, how much efforts you put in. cheers! lastly, i want to dedicate this song to all the lovers our there! cherish and embrace. for i had lost mine!
i wanna be with you by xu jie er.
